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2010年10月15日 星期五

Time for some Friday Fun

How time flies. Yesterday when I wrote my blog, I mistook Wednesday for a Monday! The mistake has now been corrected. And that reminds me that it's time for a bit of Friday fun. I got lucky again. Yesterday, one of my friends sent me some new jokes about a topic of eternal interest: the relationship between men and women and that institution by which nearly all children's stories would end when the author blithely announces that the beautiful princess married the handsome prince and that they "lived happily ever after." Married men and married women might, however,  have some pretty different stories to tell or some very funny jokes to relate on that topic. Since it's the Double Nine festival tomorrow, here are 9 of them which I found more hilarious than others.


 


1.    You have two choices in life:  you can stay single and be miserable or get married and wish you were dead.


 


2.     At a cocktail party, one woman said to another:

             " Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"


        "Yes, I am. I am married to the wrong man."


 


3.     A little boy asked his father, " Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"


        The father replied, " I don't know, son. I'm still paying."


 


4.     A young son asked his father: " Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"


        Dad replied: " That happens in every country, son."


 


5.     At a party, when asked about marital bliss by a young starry-eyed debutante, a lady was overheard to say in a dreary voice over the rim of a glass of gin:


        " I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. By then, it was too late."


 


6.     Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.


 


7.     If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say--talk in your sleep.


 


8.    A woman's prayer:  "Dear Lord, I pray to you for some wisdom to understand a man, to love and to forgive him; for some patience, for his moods because Lord if I pray for strength, I just might turn him into pulp."


 


9.    Husband:  When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you manage to do that?


       Wife:         I clean the toilet.


       Husband:   How does that help?


       Wife:         I use your toothbrush.


 


Have a pleasant Double Nine Festival and a long weekend. Don't get me wrong, marriage is still very much alive even today. Why? Don't ask me. Ask all the other married men and women and those rushing to Cotton Tree Drive Marriage Registry!


 


12 則留言:

  1. It's funny and yet most of them are factual.
     
    I like joke #9 in particular! Thanks for giving me a happy heart to start the day and you have a good weekend too!
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 09:28:00]I don't suppose you ever found your toothbrush smelt a bit funny in the monring or before you went to bed?!

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  2. love #4
    good to read all these before the office hours
    Have a nice weekend !
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 09:29:00]Yes, how can you blame the men? The women don't understand themselves either!

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  3. I like no. 9 most! Maybe I will make it practical someday~
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 09:30:00]I bet you 10,000 to 1 that that 'll never happen!

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  4.         The father replied, " I don't know, son. I'm still paying."
    Mutual love shouldn’t end with the honeymoon, it should continue all the years. look to this day ! For it is life, the very true of life.
    Happy Double Nine festival.
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 15:07:00]Of course, it's a joke though the joke may also have a basis in social reality.
    When you refer to "mutual love" and say that it should continue beyond honeymmon, I take it that you are talking about the love between husband and wife and not that between parent and children. If so, then to me, that mutual love should continue not just beyond honeymoon but in the ideal case, until either party to the union dies. But then since that love is supposed to be mutual, each party must CONTINUE  to contribute to its development: they must enrich it in new ways peculiar to their respective temperament, talents, gifts, education, knowledge, opportunities and personal history and add new contents to it each day, week, year etc . They must treat the relationship not as a one-all operation but a constantly growing relationship as if it has a life of its own ie. their relationship with each other. In human relationship, one plus one may not necessarily equal two but two plus X, where X is the peculiar chemistry between the two in their mutual interaction.  

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  5. ha ha, just say hi first,  and then I'm going to read your article, in fact, I should come  as often as possible because  I can learn another way of thinking from you, however, these days I have been searching some clocks and the reminders for my blog until yesterday I completed them all.
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 15:36:00]Good for you. If you learn anything here, my guess is that your lessons will more likely be negative! You learn more what you should never do than what you should!
    I am so pleased for you that you have completed your little project!
    Have fun!

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  6. Ha ha!!! I like the last joke the most. Ha ha.
    [版主回覆10/15/2010 15:37:00]You are in good company!

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  7. That's life, whether or not you're married, You'll never know what comes next in your life, or what'll happen in the future ...?  " The fun of living,    Fun to guess what's the next guess,     Of  mystery and of wonder,      Living today, tomorrow and yesterdays..."  Good evening, my dear old friend! 










    [版主回覆10/15/2010 23:46:00]You're quite right. There's fun in the mystery of the future. There may be risk. But there may also be fun. You can't have one without the other. That's why I hate it if people tell me what the ending of a film or a novel or drama shall be. The joy of discovery is gone!

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  8. Good morning Elzorro, "There's fun in the mystery of the future". Well, I've never thought of that before but only scare of knowing nothing about what will happen to me in the future, something might take my family away from me that really dread me to crazy, because my father died in sudden during his travel in China. However, yes, I should re-think about your words. as I said before, You inspire me of thinking.
    Have a nice day!
    [版主回覆10/16/2010 10:11:00]Yes, you are not alone in feeling a bit scared about the future. When we think about the future, there is uncertainty, there is ambiguity. We know that there may be danger if we do not see clearly. Is that not the reason why children are afraid of the dark? A little of that fear remains for adults too. But where there is uncertainty, there may also be opportunties. The future may not be all bad. There may be some hidden good in the future too. Whether we regard the future with fear or with confidence is something we can train ourselves on. We can develop a habit of looking on the brighter side of life. It's called optimism. But far too many chooses its opposite, pessismism. In fact, the future is neutral! As I said, we are as likely to meet with fun and enjoyment and happiness as danger, disappointments, sadness and sorrow . We need to take a balanced view and for psychological health with the balance tilted slightly more towards the optimistic side. That's what I do. I often tell myself: what is the worst? I'm going to die. Then I tell myself, I'm going to die anyway. It's just that I may die a little earlier than I expected, that's all. But considered from the point of view of the universe as a whole, what is the difference between having one more or one less person? Absolutely nothing. So why worry? Of course, you may say, my death may cause misery and sadness to my family etc . But, people will not, and people cannot be sad forever. Maximum one year or two, and most likely much much less,  unless it's pathological. But if it is pathaological, the fault may not be with us! So why worry? I'd rather treasure what I have, enjoy what I have rather than worry about what I may not have or hanker after what I don't or may not have in the future. That way I am always happy. And when you are happy, it shows in your appearance. We all like to see people who are happy, has a smiling face and laughs often. We spread our joy, our happiness to those with whom we come into contact with. To me, if ever there can be a mission in life, I consider that my mission. I enjoy poetry and other beautiful things like music, films, art etc etc. I write about them so that others may share my joy. I enjoy finding out various things, I share what I find with them.  I hope they may feel a little of the joy that I find in beauty and my joy of discovery! Thank you for encouraging me to continue writing.  You have a nice day too.

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  9. forgot to tell you why I liked the last joke because I also do the same thing, too, when I am angry I go to clean the toilet to release from anger,. Ha ha, of course, I haven't thought of using my family's toothbrush, 
    [版主回覆10/16/2010 10:31:00]Ha ha! In fact, from the psychological point of view, the worst that someone can do when one is angry is to keep the anger within the body. Anger is a physiological response of our body we have when we feel we are confronting an enemy. Anger is the automatic physiological reaction which is the prelude to aggressive behavior or action. Our muscles got all tensed up for action. That's why whenever we are angry, we should do something to release that tension, through "action". We can shout loudly to release the tension. But often, we can't do that. Others will think we are crazy. It is considered bad form, lack of self-control and is socially disapprofved. In fact that's what we should do! If we are prevented from doing that, then the hormones activating us to physical muscular action stays within our bloodstreams and if they stay there a long time, it may cause ulcers and all kinds of other physical pains. A lot of the people in HK often complain that they got pains in the back, their neck, their shoulders, their chest, or this part or that part of their body. Very often it is the result of lack of action for the release of the muscular tension accompanying their unreleased anger provoked by maybe some perceived unfair treatment,  some unjustfied criticism, cruel words intended to hurt us uttered by others like their spouse, children, parent, felllow worker, boss, even "friends" etc. So it's a good strategy to do something "physical" to release the muscular tension when we are angry. We stay healthier that way. Good for you. Using the toothbrush is a joke of course! Have a nice day.

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  10. 早晨.Elzoorro. 今日Saturday 啦.. 仲有冇FUN ?
    [版主回覆10/16/2010 10:35:00]You're greedy, aren't  you ? But OK, maybe, I'll just serve a wee bit more, an extra portion to match the slightly longer weekend. Just be patient.

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  11. Ha ha! thank you for telling me that. I see now, to release the tension by working is a good way to do.
    [版主回覆10/16/2010 12:16:00]Don't thank me. Thank the scientists who work tirelessly to bring us the lesson. I learn it from them. Thank them!.

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  12. I'm sorry to say that I've been being so busy and I'd stopped to write blogs for a while. I would come back again in a big holidays. But during this time, you can come and talk to me anytime you want. I'll reply some of the important emails only.

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