Saturday fun

No matter how many times you hear them, somehow jokes about that most exasperating, puzzling and yet fascinating relation between a woman and a man never feel outdated. Here are some jokes that had been sent to me by a friend which I think may bring a few knowing smiles upon your face this gloomy weekend.

1.   Male and Female arithmetic

Smart man  + dumb woman  = an affair

Dumb man   + smart woman = a marriage

Dumb man   + dumb woman  = a pregnancy

Smart man  + smart woman  = a game

2.  Office Arithmetic

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee =
production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

3.  Shopping Maths

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he
needs.

A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item
that she doesn't need.

4. How To Stop People Bugging You
About Getting Married

Wobbly female relatives used to poke me gently in the ribs during weddings, cackling, 'You're next!' but stopped after I started doing the
same to them at funerals.

5. Different Worries

A woman worries about the future until
she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future
until he gets a wife.

6. Success

 A successful man is one who makes more
money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find
such a man.

 

7.  Happiness

To be happy with a man, you must
understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love
her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

8. Propensity To Change

A woman marries a man expecting he
will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that
she won't change, and she does.

9. Arguments

A woman has the last word in any
argument.

Anything a man says after that is the
beginning of a new argument.

10. Longevity

Married men live longer than single
men do, but often married men are a lot more willing to die.

Take time off to relax, relax and relax. Tomorrow will then be a better day !